Tomorrow Company will be performing at boogie's show/competition in Sacramento. I'm excited to finally perform again even though i feel a bit rusty. I feel like I haven't been actually "dancing" since I took on my position in May so getting back into the swing of things is kinda hard. It's fun being able to see everyone again and hanging out at the studio it's so weird how it feels like forever but it's only been a month since company has been in the studio sweating together. I can't wait to take SI and begin a new season, is it season 5 already? or am i trippen? Season 4 was bittersweet for me I've been on a seasaw for a couple of months now and dancing hasn't been my number one. I know I've blogged numerous times about this but it's always on my mind like whether my dancing days are over, whether this is a phase i'm going through or if it's basically that i don't have time. But, when i think of stopping, I feel like there's a part of me that can't let go of dancing no matter how hard or busy my schedule is and is going to get. Everything that comes with dancing has helped define who i am and to let it go is like letting go a big chunk of my life that I've put my blood, sweat and tears in and that ain't easy..so for season 5 i am going to have a different outlook on dancing and dancing in the company it's no longer about anything but myself and the music and how I want to express it. i think that's the best thing i've found in dancing.
On Sunday Chinese girl Artressa and I will be going to San Diego to meet up biatch Lauren. Thanks again to Jay for letting us stay at her place and condolences to her family. This trip is a long awaited reunion (okay, it hasn't been that long but it feels long!) and vacation for us three. We're gona go to the beach for sure!! take class and hang out without a schedule! I'm super excited and i know they are too I'm glad the planning of the trip worked out and i'm glad i am gona be spending it with my girls.
When i get back ill be starting school.. i've never been this ready and i'm gonna work at it at full force. I'm so determined that this was the best route i could've taken and I have my mom to thank for helping me in this process.
Hmm.. what else, so far my summer has been good i've noticed that i'm starting to live a little more freely letting go a little more (in a good way) i can feel myself growing up and not paying attention to stuff that isn't worth my time it's a good feeling when you know yourself and you know where you came from and where you're headed and yet you still stick to who you are. i think that's one of the best things i have ever done for myself and i can only hope that i keep movin up from here.
til after sandy ego,
marien.
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